Monday, April 30, 2012

A Slight Break

I'm a fair man. I've decided to give you some time to Save a few inmates over on RZ's blog. I've decided to let you play with Grace and Lady some more.

And I am most certainly not stalling to give the good doctor time to uphold his end of the game. No siree, that's not what I'm doing at all!

Friday, April 27, 2012

Elimination 3


Name: Thomas Dial-

Condition: Severe Narcolepsy

History: Developed Narcolopsy during adolescence. The condition was minor at first, but as he grew older, he began to fall asleep more an more often. Prior to being sent to Shady Lawn, he fell asleep at the wheel of his truck, causing a collision that killed three people.


Christopher Silas-

Condition: Antisocial Personality Disorder

History: Since childhood, Christopher has routinely put others in harm's way, bullied his classmates, and manipulated people into giving him what he wants. He has been arrested multiple times for multiple crimes. At his most recent trial, he was found Not Guilty By Reason of Insanity, as he seemed unable to understand why his crimes were wrong, and showed no remorse over his many victims.



Two days.

Good luck.

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Elimination 2


Name: John Marshall-

Condition: Stage six Alzheimer's disease.

History: Mr. Marshall's descent into madness was a slow, albeit excruciating one. He showed manyof the obvious symptoms of Alzheimer's such as minor lapses in memory, continuously losing personal objects and becoming socially withdrawn and moody in challenging situations without much danger to himself or his surroundings. However, after a particularly vicious outburst involving a frozen turkey and the belief that his daughter was an imposter sent from hell, he was admitted to our institution with little chance of release. Court date pending.


Name: Paul Ross-

Condition: Pyromania

History: Mr. Ross had a liking for setting ants on fire as a child. Continuing into adolescence, he kidnapped small animals and trapped them in cages, setting them aflame to watch them die. At the age of 18, he was caught in the act of literally barbequing his neighbor's chihuahua in his front garden. His lawyer begged for an insanity defense, and so he found his way to Shady Lawn.


After that last one, it's clear that I overestimated your abilities. So here's a riddle that should be closer to your level:

pof qmvt pof frvbmt......?

Once again you have two days. I would have given you only one day, but like I said, I've decided to be merciful to you pack of mental deficients. 

Monday, April 23, 2012

Elimination 1

Let's meet who we're voting for today, hm?


Name: Heath Able

Condition: Insists that there is someone hiding in his skin. Cuts himself open in order to get this person out.

History: Graduated Valedictorian of his high school, with a scholarship to Havard University. However, over the summer his mental state began to show signs of sharp deterioration. Before his colleges classes started, he began cutting at himself. He was interred at Shady Lawn shortly thereafter.


James Dees

Condition: Extreme mysophobia

History: Records indicate that Dees showed signs of mysophobia since childhood, though it was minor. He was fastidiously clean and refused to go outside during recess for fear of getting dirty. Over the years, his phobia progressively got worse. Before being admitted to Shady Lawn, he owned an apartment and spent all day cleaning it with bleach in an attempt to kill any bacteria. He was so intent on this work that he neglected everything else and nearly starved himself to death.


I'll start you out with something easy-- even easy than Minstrel's stupid things:

Ti woflswol oyu evreewhr uoy og. Ti tancon eb ense utb ti nac eb rdeha. 

Two days to solve it. Remember to post your choice along with your answer.

Oh, and if it's not solved before time limit's up, both are eliminated.

Sunday, April 22, 2012

The Rules, Second Edition

Everything's been squared away with Doc Beakman. It's amazing what that man will agree to as long as you call it a "social experiment." Did I ever tell you that he works for one of the big guys? I serve the Empress-- The Wooden Girl. He works for the Magician, who I suppose most people know as the Plague Doctor.

Now, we move onto my game. His experiment. My rules. Pay attention now, because, as they say, this shit be complicated.

First, you should understand who our contestants are. Why, they are all the inmates in this lovely sanitarium! Their fate is in your hands.

So, the rules:

1. I will periodically post riddles on this blog, along with two brief dossiers containing patient information. Whoever solves the riddle chooses on of those two patients to be "eliminated." The riddles on this blog are henceforth known as the Elimination Rounds.

2. This hapless orderly has been selected to deliver the second set of riddles: the Salvation Rounds. The rules are the same as for the Elimination Rounds, except that this time the puzzle solver selects an inmate to be made immune to elimination.

3. Grace shall not be participating. Yet. I have other plans for her.

4. Since I am Oh So Busy, my Misfits will be keeping an eye on things, making sure it all runs smoothly. I just realized that I never properly introduced them...

Crybaby is some old fool whose constantly turning on the water works. You ever seen an old man cry? It's hilarious. He'll be keeping an eye on "R.Z." the hapless ordlerly, making sure he doesn't try to cheat or alert the authorities.

Face is an incredibly boring man for whom "humor" is merely an outdated medical term. He'll be my liaison with Beakman. I imagine the two will get along well. Neither is particularly interesting.

Mr. Bun is the muscle of the group. Big guy. He also has a really annoying voice, which is why I sewed his mouth shut. He'll be assisting Crybaby in keeping an eye on R.Z.

Gigglepuss is the man who understands how to tell a good check. My most successful pupil. He also loves pain. Cuts himself all the time, all over his body. If I had to criticize, I'd say his beard makes him look like a hobo. He will, of course, be monitoring the situation in Shady Lawn Sanitarium.

Lady is the youngest of the Misfits. We use him to put people off guard. Flirtatious fellow, though sometimes I think his heart isn't into it. That probably has something to do with the time I took a jigsaw to his crotch. He'll be keeping Grace company, and helping to prep her for her role.

And that's all for now, dearies. The games start tomorrow.

Saturday, April 21, 2012

Enough of That

Don't bother trying to solve that last "riddle." Minstry cheated and just wrote gibberish. He admitted as much to me after I gave him a very stern lecture about the ethics of playing games. So he was a phony. Couldn't even play any instruments.

And don't expect Minstry to post anymore. I'd let him tell you why himself, but his face is currently nailed above the doorframe. It's not a very nice looking face.

Hold on...

Oh, I remember him! Victor! Or Vince. His name definitely started with V anyway. Yeah, I met him years ago. You know me and him go way back to his childhood, see? We had a business arrangement-- he gave me his parent's wallets, I showed him what the inside of a woman was like. Kept the heart as a souvenir.

So that just leaves the question of what to do with this here blog. I'd hate to disappoint those people who came here looking for a game. But I don't want a game that's as simple and braindead as Minstry's.

Hmmmmmm... Now I have an idea. I'll have to go speak with Doctor Beakman. Call it a "Social Experiment." That sounds medical and shit, right?

Oh, forgive me. I never introduced myself.

Hello all. I am Jester. May the games begin.

Friday, April 20, 2012

Third Riddle

Well, fine. I suppose you're laughing at me? My riddles are so easy? Well I'm just getting warmed up.

GhfrLyu JnbgtREwblu QazplbvrcVNM dsaioYObuasdi?

Once again: Two days. Let's see you solve this if you're so smart!

Second Riddle

Congratulations, booba. Or not. SOMEONE decided to give away the solution.

Anyway, here's the second riddle:

94428 4447777 777766699955533668 4777333366?

You have two days.

Thursday, April 19, 2012

The First Riddle

Let me sing you a song:


You have two days

The Rules

Meet Grace

She's just had a bad trip.

Want to know a secret? I did that. I mixed up her medication. And I can do it again.

So here's the rules: I post a riddle, and you have two days to solve it. If you don't solve it in time, Grace goes on a trip to cookoo lala land, and who knows what sharp objects might find their way into her room?

The first riddle goes up soon enough, dearies.

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Just a Song

Gather 'round, ye children, and I shall sing ye song.

Some time ago, there was a woman named Grace Smith. She had a twin brother named Derek. Grace loved her brother, but one day he was taken away by a madman calling himself the Jester.

Derek was placed in a cabin, all alone, and Jester announced that Derek's life would depend on a game.

Jester would post coded riddles, and whoever solved the riddles would be given a choice regarding Derek's living conditions. Would he receive junk food or health food? A dishwasher or a clothes washer? That sort of thing. Meanwhile, Grace was receiving her own riddles. Riddles which led her across the United States, in search of her brother.

But there was a secret that Grace did not know. She had an alternate personality. Once it had called itself Karen, but nowadays it preferred the name Kevin. Jester had met Karen long ago, when she was a child, and had offered to help her become "The Princess of Puppets." For you see, Jester is the servant of a being known as the Wooden Girl, who controls people and makes them her dolls.

Karen hadn't left with him. And now Jester would have his revenge.

When Grace found the cabin, she found her brother within. But he was Derek no longer. The Wooden Girl had entangled him in her strings, and he was a mere puppet now. He attacked Grace, and she had no choice but to defend herself.

No choice but to kill her own brother.

And what became of Grace? Well, she found herself in Shady Lawn Sanitarium, under the care of renowned psychologist, Dr. Beakman. She has left the incident behind.

But I think it's time for a new game.

I am the Minstrel, and I shall bring new fun into Grace's life.

Stay tuned.